And on the issue of weight and sex and such…
I have so many thoughts on this subject. I will try to limit this post to one or two of them, because I think I could write volumes. It would bore you, and I don’t have that many hours to sit still and type today anyway.
I don’t feel so sexy right now. At 15+ pounds over my July weight, it’s no wonder, right? The weight is budging and my body fat percentage is going down; I think I’m truly ready to lose it now and I’m well on my way. I’m not sure what purpose it served, although I have some suspicions about that.
The Belgian has a head cold, and I was looking up some symptoms in my Louise Hay book, You can Heal Your Life. (This is a terrific book which supports my belief that what we think about has bearing on our physical health, and that our physical symptoms can be indicators of emotional issues we have not addressed.) I thought I would check out “belly fat” while I was there, just for fun, since this is a relatively new area of my body where I have begun to carry weight. I was astounded to read the probable cause…
Anger at being denied nourishment.
And it is a fit for me, because I have been under the impression that in order to stop feeling lonely, I need to get a job. I envisioned that daily water-cooler conversations and office gossip over quick lunches would fill my social black hole. I’ve been holding out for a job where I would be surrounded with people of similar education levels and mindsets, so I would feel comfortable and have things in common with them.
I’ve also been under the illusion that I would be more fulfilled if I could find someone to date who didn’t live 3,500 miles away.
I view social activity as nourishment – nourishment for my very lonely soul.
According to Ms. Hay, my new thought pattern should be…
“I nourish myself with spiritual food, and I am satisfied and free.”
The more I realize I don’t require other people in my life in order to be happy, the more open I become to forming new relationships, as became evident on my recent Florida trip, which I will get to in a later post.
As for feeling sexy, well, my primary personality type during this time of year is the Organized Mother and Efficient Christmas Activity Director, which doesn’t leave too much energy or thought for sex.
I’m preferring my flannel gowns to satin lingerie.
Besides, I sure don’t want a head cold right now… 🙂