Don’t ask, because I don’t know why or how.
I’m still biting the insides of my mouth as I type this post, but my insides are not emitting electric pulses that make me feel all itchy and uncomfortable. My insides are relatively quiet.
What is different about this week?
One big thing is that my ex’s Crazy Cycle (I want to come up with another word for him – I hate the word “ex.”) of badgering emails and general irritations has subsided for now, as is the pattern with him. I stood up, I said no, and I did not respond unless it was completely necessary. I guess he found someone else to bother.
I started running 3-4 times during the week. I cut back on the chocolate and stopped snacking so much (again, don’t ask me how I did that – the cravings just sort of subsided). I’m eating more vegetables via a big home-made salad for lunch most days.
And, last Saturday afternoon, I took the plunge and bought two pair of fat-fat jeans. I call them fat-fat, because I was already into my fat jeans, and they were too tight. Simply by buying clothes that fit, I look like I dropped 5-10 pounds, and suddenly started to act accordingly.
I bought new eye shadows in the season’s shades of purples, and I like the way I feel when I do my eyes up big and smokey.
I spent an hour at a local nursery and bought gorgeous, rust-colored mums for my front porch. It felt like some kind of plant therapy – I was so delighted about those mums.
I feel twinges of my sex drive returning. I was listening to a song with a sexy dance beat on the radio the other day, and I felt a little tickle “down there.” Hmm… I’m not dead after all.