Training is in full swing for marathon number 2, and I feel great. Today I had 11 miles on the schedule that easily stretched into a beautiful 12, and boy, did I need that. My brain just wouldn’t shut up for the first 5 or so, but eventually I found the peace and quiet I longed for.
Blue Eyes once told me that, in letting go, one must release the good as well as the bad. I never quite got that until today. My week was full of exciting things that set my head a whirl, and I found it impossible to calm down until I let it go on this run. The adrenalin is over and done. I don’t live there anymore. I gathered it all up in a mental bubble and watched it float away in the countryside. Today is a new day with infinite possibilities for more good stuff; the 12-miler was a terrific start.
Focusing more on my pace this time around, it’s really killing me to keep the “slow” in “long, slow distance.” I run exactly the way I do life. I find a comfortable place and stay in it, regardless of the conditions around me or the benefits of moving out of my comfort zone. I will risk injury in order to keep doing it my way. It throws me off balance to do it differently.
Battling my legs and energy level, but mostly my head, I managed to hold my pace down by about 60 seconds per mile for most of this run.
My first double-digit run was last March, and I remember how I felt in that last mile. My back hurt – my shoulders were drooping. I was in determined survival mode. And I did it. And I went on to run longer distances the same way. Today, months later, I finished faster (despite the conscientious slower pace) and fresher, and I was ready to do it again.
I’m always looking for immediate fixes and gratification, but certain things cannot be rushed. Some things – like good cheese, amazing sex, divorce recovery, and becoming a long-distance runner – just take time. And oh, they’re all SO worth the wait.